No Bees were harmed in the making of this article.
I’ve always felt that there has been critical chaos among women. Most of the time I feel that society pits us against one another. It doesn’t matter if it was Light Skin vs. Dark Skin, Skinny vs. Curvy or if you were on Team Veronica or Team Betty in the “Archie” comics there has always been a subtle scent of “hating” in the female population. It has come to my attention that the hating is running rampant in the plus community. Whatever happened to just being genuinely happy for someone’s success? Or offering a helping hand or your specialty for the greater good of the community?
I spent some time chit chatting with a plus size model and she was confiding in me the sheer amount of drama that takes place when you mix women, fashion and egos. While she was talking I found myself spacing out and my mind took me to a cartoon beehive. Crazy I know, but sometimes I like to space out in animation. (Don’t Judge!) In my cartoon bee daydream there were lots of plus size bees, some skinny bees that wished they were as fly as the plus size bees and then there was one Queen Bee. Every Bee Colony has a Queen Bee. The Queen Bee is the only one that can reproduce, When the Queen Dies; the colony will most likely die out within a few months. If the worker bees are smart, they will work hard to ensure there is a replacement Queen ready through a process called supercedure. Now here is where things get a little interesting. The worker bees may have enough time to raise several baby larvae as replacement queens, whomever is the first little baby larvae from the bunch to emerge from their queen cup, they’re bestowed the honor of being the new queen of the colony. Then the new queen goes on a killing spree and stabs all the other larvae to death in their little cells. If the old queen is still alive, the new queen will stab her up too. Okay I’ll stop with the national geographic imagery here.
From time to time the plus modeling industry and the plus community will feel like a bee hive, it may even have some of the elements of bee hive pandemonium, you may even feel like a worker bee. However we have made efforts collectively to end that way of thinking, because remember once the Queen dies the colony/community dies with her. At this point we have to focus on longevity, our mission, the future of the community and the women in it. Women within the community should be thinking on how to be trailblazers in their own right. Compete with each other on a level of understanding that there is enough room at the table for everyone to eat. Encourage others to take their place in history and in the mission of fashion, size acceptance, beauty and erasing stigmas.
Yes, it’s great to have leaders, visionaries, etc. However while you are idolizing them, you aren’t elevating yourself. Step out of the worker bee mentality and put your plans and dreams into action. If someone is upset about your progress it is because they have a Bee Hive Mentality and realize their “Queenliness” is at stake by the new young queen bee that is ready to slay.
This little life tidbit doesn’t just apply to the plus community, but to every scenario where you as a woman feel the glass ceiling of oppression. Challenge it; even though it may be easier to go along with the colony, you lose a little bit of yourself when you engage in “groupthink.”
Follow Nina Taylor on Twitter: www.twitter.com/plusmodelnina
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